An assemblage of quotes of Scott Lang's partner-in-crime, Luis.
Spoken by Luis
- "We can handle it; we're professionals."
- "That's what I'm talking about! That's what I'd call a... an unfortunate casualty."
- ―Luis after knocking a guard unconscious
Spoken about Luis
- "So we expand our team. What do we need? A fake security guard on the inside to de-pressurize the water system, somebody else to hack in the power supply and kill the laser grid, and a gateaway guy."
"No, no. No, no, no. Not those three wombats. No way."
- ―Scott Lang advising Hank Pym to recruit Luis, Dave, and Kurt.
- "Hey, how's your girl man?"
"Ah, she left me..."
"Yeah, my mom died too... and my dad got deported. But I got the van!"
- "Tell me about the tip."
I wanna know about that tip.
"Oh, baby! It's on! It's so on, right now!"
"Calm down alright? I just neeed to know where it came from. It's gotta be airtight."
- ―Luis and the others getting excited when Scott Lang wants to join them.
- "Okay. I was at a wine tasting with my cousin Ernesto. Which was mainly reds, and you know I don't like reds, man. But there was a rose that saved the day. It was delightful. And then he tells me about this girl, Emily, that we used to kick it with. It was actually the first pair of boobs I ever touched."
"It's the wrong details. It has nothing to do with the story. Go."
- ―Luis telling the plan before interrupted by Scott Lang
- "So, uh, he tells me that she's working as a housekeeper now, right? And she's dating this dude, Carlos, who's a shot caller from across the bay. And she tells him about the dude that she's cleaning for. Right? That he's like this big-shot CEO, that is all retired now, but he's loaded. And so, Carlos and Ernesto are on the same softball team, and they get to talking, right? And here comes the good part. Carlos says, "Yo, man. This guy's got a big-ass safe just sitting in the basement, just chilling." Of course Ernesto comes to me because he knows I got mad thieving skills. Of course, I ask him... "Did Emily tell Carlos to tell you to get to me what kind of safe it was?" And he says, "Nah, dawg. All she said is that it's super-legit and whatever's in it it's gotta be good.""
- ―Luis proceed telling the plan while Scott Lang is confused
- "Oh, man."
"What is it?"
"Well, they weren't kidding. This safe is serious."
"How serious are we talking, Scotty?"
"It's a Carbondale. It's from 1910. Made from the same steel as the Titanic."
"Wow. Can you crack it?"
"Well, here's the thing. It doesn't do so well in the cold. Remember what that iceberg did?"
"Yeah, man. It killed DiCaprio."
"Did not kill the old lady. She still threw the jewel into the oceans."
- ―Luis, Scott Lang, Dave, and Kurt talking in the process of robbing Hank Pym.
- "Thank you for the coffee ma'am. It's not too often that you rob a place, and then get welcomed back. Because we just robbed you!"
"You know he was arrested for stealing a smoothie machine, right?"
"Two smoothie machines."
- ―Hope van Dyne and Luis
- "You'll forgive us if we're not instilled with confidence."
"Well, hey, everybody just kick back and relax a litte bit, man. We know our business. We broke into this spooky-ass house, didn't we?"
"I let you."
"Well, one could say that I let you let me."
"Look, it's okay. They can handle this."
"Yeah, we can handle it."
- ―Dave and Luis debating with Hank Pym before interrupted by Scott Lang.
- "Damn. Whoa! That's so cool, bro!"
"Now, look. This is gonna get weird, all right? It's pretty freaky, but it's safe. There's no reason to be scared."
"Oh, no, no. Daddy won't be scared."
"This is the work of gypsies."
"Wow, that's amazing."
"That's like David Copperfield shit."
"That's some kind of wizardry."
"This is sorcery!"
"How'd you do that, bro?
"Don't freak out. Look at your shoulder."
(Screaming) "Ahhh! Get off! Get off!"
"Wait, I thought Daddy didn't get scared?!"
- ―Luis, Kurt, and Dave when Scott Lang demonstrating his powers in front of them for the first time.
- "All right, just so we're clear, everyone here knows their role, right?"
"Wheels on the ground."
"Eyes in the sky."
"Oh, man, you know it. You know what? I get to wear a uniform. That's awesome."
"I'm sorry. I'm good. I'm good. I'm just excited. Plus your girlfriend's really hot. So, you know, that makes me nervous, too. And you're very beautiful, ma'am."
"Oh my lord."
"She's not my..."
- ―Luis, Kurt, Dave, Scott Lang and Hank Pym discussing about the plan.
- "Hey! What are you doing here?"
"Uh... Boss-man said to secure the area, so I'm securing it."
"I'm the boss."
- ―Luis before punching a guard down.
- "Hey Scotty? Hey, did I save your life? Scotty? Scotty?"
"(Painting) Thank you, Luis."
"Yeah. Are we the good guys?"
"Feels kind of weird you know."
"Yeah, but we're not done yet. Get out of here before this place blows!"
- ―Luis and Scott Lang
- "Scotty needs us, you know what I'm saying? Ain't nothing gonna stop us!"
"Back it up. Back it up, slow. Yeah."
"Back it up."
"Back it up."
"B-B-B-B-Back it up."
"Yep, just backin' up."
"No, no. Just back it up.""
- ―Luis, Kurt, and Dave declaring to help Scott Lang but decided to retreat upon seeing a bunch of cops.
- "Here's the deal. Just give me the facts."
"Just the facts. Only the facts."
"Breathe. Focus. Keep it simple."
"No, no, no. No doubt, no doubt. Okay. So, I'm at this art meseum with my cousin Ignacio, right? And there was like, like, abstract, expressionism exhibit. But you know me, I'm here like a Neo-Cubist kind of guy, right? But there was this one Rothko that was sublime, bro! Oh, my God!"
"Okay, sorry. Sorry. You know, I just get excited and stuff."
- ―Scott Lang advising Luis not to do a very long summary.
- "But anyway, anyway - Ignacio tells me: "Yo, I met this crazy fine writer chick at the spot last night, like *fine*, fine, crazy stupid fine." And he goes up to the bartender and says: "Look at that girl I'm with? Y'know I sayin' she's crazy stupid fine, right?" And the bartender all like: "Yeah, crazy stupid fine!". So this writer chick tells Ignacio: "Yo, I'm like a boss in the world of guerilla journalism and I got mad connects with the peeps behind the curtains, you know what I'm saying?". Ignacio is like: "For real?", and she's like: "Yeah. You know what, I can't tell you who my contact is because he works for the Avengers!"."
" Yeah, and this dude sounds like a badass, man! Like he comes up to her and says: "Yo, I'm looking for this dude who's new on the scene who's flashing this fresh tech, who's got, like, bomb moves, right? Who you got?". And she's like: "Well, we got everything nowadays, we got a guy who jumps, we got a guy who swings, we got a guy who jumps, we got a guy who swings, we got a guy who crawls up the walls, you gotta be more specific!". And he's like: "I'm looking for a guy that shrinks.". And I'm like: Daaamn! I got all nervous 'cause I keep mad secrets for you, bro. So I asked Ignacio: "Did the bad-ass tell the stupid fine writer chick to tell you to tell me because I'm tight with Ant-Man that he's looking for him?".
"And? What'd he say?"
"He said yes."
- ―Luis and Scott Lang - Luis imitating Ignacio, Writer, Bartender and Falcon
Spoken by Luis
- "Wassup? You don’t remember that Beloved Commercial? Wassup!"
- "I wish I had a suit. Even with, like, minimal powers. Or even just a suit. With no powers."
- "Tell me you got the van washed for tomorrow morning."
"Down to the undercarriage, baby."
"You sprung for the undercarriage wash?"
"Well you said to get the works."
"That’s a scam, bro. We live in California, not Minnesota!"
"He’s right. The undercarriage wash? That’s for cleaning off road salt. Laid out in all those snow-laden sister states."
"Who are you and why do you know so much about car wash protocol?"
- ―Luis, Dave and Sonny Burch
- "You know what, you’re right. This isn’t truth serum. ‘Cause I don’t feel anything. That was a lie. I did feel something. This is truth serum!"
"There’s no such thing."
"Where is Scott Lang?"
"Well, see, that’s complicated. ‘Cause when I first met Scotty, he was in a bad place. And I’m not talking about cell block D. His wife had just filed for divorce. And I was like, “Man, homie, she dumped you while you were in lock-up?” And he’s like, “Yeah, I know. I thought I was gonna be with her forever, but now I’m all alone.” And I was like, “Man, homie, you gotta chin up. ‘Cause you’ll find a new partner. But you know what? I’m Luis.” And he says, “You know what? I’m Scotty. And we’re gonna be best friends.”"
"Wait, hold on, hold on. Now I like a good story as much as the next person, but what’s this have to do what where Scott Lang is?"
"I’m getting there. I’m getting there."
"You put a dime in him, you got to let the whole song play out."
"He’s like human jukebox."
"Oh, my Abuelita had a jukebox in a restaurant. Yeah, only played Morrissey. And if anybody ever complained, she’d be like, “Oh, porque? Gusta mas?” And El Chicanos, we call them mas, “then, adios!” What can I say? We relate to these melancholy bandits, you know?"
"Right, right. So anyway, this gets out of jail and starts working for Hank. And that’s when he met Hope. And Hope’s all like, “I want nothing to do with you. Look at my hairdo. I’m all business.” And then Scotty’s like, “You know what, girl? My heart’s all broken, and I’ll probably never find love again. But man, I want to kiss you.” But then fast-forward, and they’re all like into each other, right? And then Scotty’s like, “You know what, I can’t tell you this, but I’m gonna go trashing an airport with Captain America!” Then she said, “I can’t believe you split like that. Smell you later, dummy!” So Scotty goes on house arrest, and he won’t admit it, but his heart’s all like, “Man, I thought Hope couldn’ve been my new true partner. But I blew it!” But fate brought them back together, and then Hope’s heart is all, “I’m worried that I can’t trust him. And he’s gonna screw up again and ruin everything.” And in my heart, it’s all like, “That fancy raspberry filling represents the company’s rent. And we’re days away from going out of business! Oooh!!”"
"Out of business?"
"Man, truth serum. I was trying to protect you guys. I swear. I was trying to be a good boss. But we’re broke!"
- ―Luis, Uzman, Sonny Burch, Dave and Kurt
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